Loss of a brother

Sunday March 26 was a day I will not soon forget. It started about as normal as any other had the last 8 months. Off to precept for class from my own department to another. After working a call I was notified that one of my co-workers and friends at my deparment had been involved in a fatal motorcycle accident. His name was Josh Olenik. He was 24 years old. I feel like I have been kicked right square in the center of the chest. It hasn't really sunk in yet. I will never get the chance to tell him good bye. I talked to him the evening before his accident and when I hung up the phone all I told him was "see you later". Of course he said the same thing back to me. I wish now I had been able to shake his hand one last time or tell him good bye to his face. Josh was a part-time police officer, a volunteer firefighter, and an EMT full-time for us. He lived his life to help others. He said to me once that he wanted to die either on a call or on his bike. I guess he got his wish. He will always be remembered by those of us in the dept that knew him. I started writing this the day that Josh died, I unfortunately was unable to complete it the day I started it. Now a little more than a week has passed. I'm exhausted, bewildered and mostly numb.

8 weeks to go

I didn't get the dreaded come take you test over again phone call this week, so I guess I passed the thing. If that holds true then there are only 8 weeks of school left. Seems sometimes like I haven't really learned anything. Then again it seems like I forgot quite a bit of stuff too. So it goes back and forth. I am starting to get really anxious about finishing this thing up, and going to work. I know I can do the job so I don't really worry about that so much, just trying to figure out where I'll make the most money and have some decent benefits again. I am also considering tryig to get back into the military, most likely in the national guard. Couldn't do it full time again, just too much stress on the family. Plus I'm pushing thirty and I do't want to have to try and keep up with 18,19, and 20 year old's all day everyday. So it's a thought, I doubt I do it. I got a pretty good thing going now. I definately wouldn't get back on a tank again. Oh well, I'm not going to worry about it. Just see where the path takes me and I guess I'll go from there. Buckle up and I'll talk at you later.

They say the worst is over?

I took the final exam for my cardiology portion of class. Not fun, not even close to fun. Relieved though, because as one of my cohorts said, either way, pass or fail at least cardiology is over. Now we sit for a week waiting to see if we get the dreaded phone call telling us that we didn't pass. As they say, no news is good news. But I feel like I passed it. Hope so at least everything hinges on this working out. Kinda like watching a game or show and they go to a friggin commercial break. Hope to know something by thursday. I think I should celebrate my success on passing this, providing of course I did. So, anybody got any ideas....I got a couple, and no they don't involve midgets or farm animals.

I would love to watch a movie with my wife

For about a week now I have been trying to watch a movie with my wife. We haven't been able to be home together at the same time long enough. I miss her, I hope she knows that. I sincerely hope that she knows that. I know she will read this and stick out her tongue and pfffttt at it but she will at least read it. She has done so much for me, I might not have seen it but she has. I know she has been through a lot too. Bad parents, moron for a husband more often than not. She ain't perfect but I love her, and so to me she is more than perfect. Her little imperfections are what endear her to me. I am the luckiest person on the planet to have her as my wife. I just hope she loves me as much as I love her. I may not have done her justice in showing her just how much I appreciate all that she does or even shown her love with some of my actions. But, I just felt like I needed to put this out there for the whole world to see. So pfffttt right back to you baby, I love you. See ya tonight.

Moving on

Another day, another life saved....ok maybe not. Cardiology is nearly done. I think I might have actually learned something. The learning part of it is over. Now we are spending the next few class days just seeing if we can apply this stuff when we need to. We are doing something called megacode. Basically we have a dummy, I don't mean me, and a specially designed cardiac monitor/defibrillator and it's just 1 person and the istructor. The monitor gets hooked up to a little machine to show a rhthm and we have to "treat" the dummy based on the scenario and the monitor interpretation. Just 1 paramedic, no help, no assistant. Just you. And the monitor will change it's rhythm somewhere between 3 and 5 times. In less than 10 minutes. It is supposed to be really stressful. I kinda think it's going to be fun. So we have that on Thursday. Then on Monday following megacode we take our cardiology final. Then spring break. I get a couple days off from school. Yay!! save me some gas money that week. Then only April and May to get through and it's over. Just have to finish up clinicals and my last bit of precepting. I suppose that will be the end of this little bloggy thing too. I don't think that I would have anything else to write about. I could write about home or whatever, but I don't think that is really very interesting. At least not my house. Funny maybe. Don't know. Anyways....that's it for now. Later.